Daniela Vega

From the “GayTimes”:

“Daniela Vega received critical acclaim for her performance in A Fantastic Woman as young trans woman Marina, a singer and waitress in Santiago whose older boyfriend dies unexpectedly. With its win for Best Foreign Language Film, A Fantastic Woman made history as the first Academy Award-winning film to feature a transgender storyline with an openly transgender actor in the lead role.

In 2018, Vega also became the first transgender person to present at the prestigious ceremony. In an interview with The Guardian, Vega said of the relationship between the transgender community and the Republican Party (trust us when we say, it’s a finger-wagging moment): “It actually gives me a physical pleasure to annoy conservatives. I don’t have to be violent, I don’t have to insult anyone – my mere existence shakes those people up.”

Un Masked

My Partner Liz, me, and trans friend Kathy

The transgender – cross dresser local group Liz and I are members of have decided to open the doors again to a rather aggressive social schedule. 

I think it is time to venture out if people have been vaccinated so I have no problem with doing it. 

Saturday is the first social get together in public, followed by an on line support group meeting on Monday and yet another public social next Thursday. 

With everyone being so tired of staying home for so long, more than likely all events will be well attended. 

The socials are a very good idea for experienced and novice transgender women of all kinds. Most importantly, the venues know we are coming and provide a safe space.  Very simply, it is a chance to get out in the public’s eye and try out fitting in in the feminine world. 

The best part is so far, everyone has not embarrassed the group by doing something decidedly ignorant. 

Even though we will not be attending Saturday nights social,  it’s a very good chance I will be at the other two. If you happen to be in the metro Cincinnati, Ohio area and need information, let me know. 

Billboard Material

Jari Jones is an actress, model, and LGBTQ+ advocate. Last year, she was one of nine models featured in an advertisement for Calvin Klein in New York City. The brand’s 2020 Pride campaign #PROUDINMYCALVINS, was a huge accomplishment. In an Instagram post she wrote, “It has been such an honor and pleasure to sit in my most authentic self and present imagery of a body that far to often has been demonized, harassed, made to feel ugly and unworthy and even killed.”

Remembering a Trans Icon

Candis Cayne

 From “Today”:

“Now, viewers can binge “Pose,” “Supergirl,” “Euphoria” or even “Star Trek: Discovery,” but when Candis Cayne sashayed onto the screen on ABC’s nighttime drama “Dirty Sexy Money” in 2007, she became the first openly transgender actor with a recurring role on a network television series.

On the show, she played the vixenous Carmelita Rainer, who was having an affair with handsome New York state attorney general Patrick Darling (Billy Baldwin), who was itching to get out from under the thumb of his billionaire father (Donald Sutherland).

“Dirty Sexy Money” only lasted one season but it broke ground in a number of ways: Cayne was a transgender woman playing a transgender character. And Carmelita wasn’t the butt of the joke — she was beautiful, and as deliciously devious as her co-stars.”

Memorial Day

 Once again here in the United States, Memorial Day rolls around . Memorial Day is meant to honor those who paid the ultimate sacrifice for their country.

Most of you regulars know , I am a transgender veteran. A fortunate one in that I survived a very ugly, unpopular and destructive conflict known as the Vietnam War. I have friends who didn’t survive  or returned with psychical/mental scars which never healed. 

I always try to mention too, the inordinate amount of transgender veterans  who served in their closets while attempting to reclaim their masculine gender status. When I see the number of graves and crosses spotlighted in media news shows on Memorial Day, I wonder how many of them took their gender secrets with them to the grave. 

What really upsets me too are the number of people who see Memorial Day as just another day off to BBQ and not spend just a minute to remember those who served and lost their lives. 

Without them, we would all be lost.

Transgender MMA Fighter

Retried MMA fighter is a veteran of the Navy and is from Toledo, Ohio.  

Now, Fallon Fox cannot wait to share her story with the world.

Fox, the first openly transgender mixed martial arts fighter, is working with Mark Gordon Pictures on a new biopic based on her career and life. Eight years after coming out publicly, Fox will now get a dramatized retelling of a story that dominated the sports world.

“It feels amazing. I feel like my story is finally going to get out there in a big way,” Fox told ET Canada. “I’m not sure how it’s going to run. Maybe it’s going to be informative, but it’s going to be entertaining and people are going to get a lot out of it.

With all the discord going on in the country concerning transgender athletes, her story is definitely timely.  

Lifestyle?

 Somehow I must have given some sort of impression being transgender was a “lifestyle”. Obviously, none of us had a choice when we embarked on this tremendously intricate and  difficult journey. Here is the reason I may have given that idea (lifestyle) from Connie:

“Whoa! What, exactly, is a “trans lifestyle” (I can’t italicize “lifestyle” here, as you did)? Lifestyle indicates a choice; trans is not a choice. While we may have made the choice to live, openly, as trans women, we don’t, necessarily, have the same lifestyles.
It could be argued that a cross dresser (included under the trans umbrella) who attends meet-ups with other cross dressers every Thursday night has adopted a lifestyle. Of course, I’m not saying that’s a bad thing, and it certainly shouldn’t define who that person is. It also is not something I, as a trans woman, choose to do as a lifestyle. Still, I can be an ally to a person who participates, without engaging in said lifestyle, myself.

I think that attaching a lifestyle to trans perpetuates a stereotype that those who are not allies like to use to define trans people. Here’s an example, from my own life, just after I had come out in an email to some long-time “friends”:

“> Thanks for your reply to our invitation for our 2013 Christmas Holiday Party.
>
> We are pleased that you have decided to live your lifestyle in all honesty to yourself. This must be bringing a contentment and joy that you have never felt or experienced before. And that’s a good thing.
>
> That said, we feel our Christmas Party is not the best setting for your first appearance in our house in this new guise.

> We are your friends, and look forward to seeing you soon. Perhaps at your house or the Eagles. Here’s to a happy and joyous holiday season.”

As you might imagine, I was not happy to receive this email. But, it wasn’t just because I had been uninvited to a yearly party that I had been welcomed at for years. Their use of the word, lifestyle, followed by the shoe-drop phrase, “That said,” and the condescending tone, infuriated me. I still have my unsent response draft in my email archives, as well. It was nasty and unbecoming of the lady I try to be, however, and I did the right thing by not sending it. Ironically, their response was much more about their “lifestyle” than it was any they perceived mine to be. And, yes, I was invited to subsequent holiday parties, and I did attend. And, no, they are not my allies; they have really not changed much at all. I have only maintained a relationship with them in hopes that they may, one day, realize that I am not just living a “lifestyle.” Oh, did I fail to mention that these people are Trump supporters? So much for my hopes, then.”


I too years ago was rejected from attending my blood relatives Thanksgiving dinner when I announced my decision to be there as my true self. In essence, my brother and sister in law caved into pressure from his right wing in laws. I moved on and was very fortunate to have been able to reestablish a very inclusive new family unit and sadly haven’t spoken to my brother since. 


Back to the transgender lifestyle comment, I feel as if in many ways we are dealing with semantics. After all, we have been forced to build new lives (lifestyles) even though we had no choice to do it.   

Cultural Humility

Today is another of the webinars I am attending concerning educating professionals on the care of elderly LGBT adults. Check out the title of this one: Cultural Humility for LGBT Older Adults.

It goes further to explain what will interest me. ” 

Activity and Life Enrichment Professionals and Ohio Nursing! Participants will be able to… • Learn basic terminology relating to sexual expression, sexual orientation and sexual identity. ” I feel the more information which is presented to the world about elderly LGBT care (and transgender in particular) is made available, the better life could be for all of us. 

Now, and I can’t resist this, speaking of elderly transgender adults, it is Connie’s birthday! (seen above)

Happy Birthday my friend!

Party On!

Above, to the left, is a picture of my granddaughter, daughter and myself. Included to my right is my ex wife’s husband who had the strokes and behind is my youngest grandson. 

Not shown (of course) is my daughters father in law who seems to hate the world with me in it. 

Connie, it seems has the same problem:

“I have the same problem with the F-I-L of my eldest daughter. I know that I make him very uncomfortable, which is great, because he had always made me uncomfortable before I was out. He’s one of those with whom any conversation leads to nowhere. That is, he never gives more than a three word answer to any question – unless it is about his church and their fundamentalist teachings, the subject of which I have always tried to avoid. I rather enjoy watching him biting his tongue now, because he is afraid to talk about things that he knows would offend me, as well as everybody else in the family. It’s not really that he doesn’t want to offend; he’s afraid of the repercussions. I still greet him with a friendly hello, and convey that it was nice to see him again upon his departure, but I’m so glad that just being myself is enough reason for us to not have to engage the whole time in-between. I’m thinking that he’s just burning up inside that he sees everyone else accepting and loving me, and my happiness is not affected by his presence or glaring from across the room.

It’s great that you had such a wonderful reunion. Let’s hope we never have to go through such a separation again.”

Let’s hope not indeed! Thanks for the comment! Further more they are aggravated because we are happy!

Jin Xing

Jin Xing (above) is a famous Chinese transgender celebrity.

Along with being director of the Shanghai contemporary dance company, she is also a well known actress, ballerina, modern dancer and choreographer. 

She was born in 1987.  She was also a member of a military dance troop and rose to the rank of colonel.