An acquaintance of mine on Facebook (Joni/above) recently wrote a post concerning an encounter she had with a cis female friend who all of the sudden “slipped” up and called her by the correct pronouns which I assume was different because how Joni responded to it.
She (Joni) responded the whole process just seemed to take a while with her friend to actually transition with her.
I believe there are multiple transitions involved with something as complex as a human gender change. Personally, I think I can recall of at least one major transition when I went from being what I referred to as a cross dresser to a fully out in the world transgender woman.
Unfortunately, we lose sight of how hard it is for others around us to make the transition also. Once again, n my case, I will use my brother as an example. He told me he would always know me and refer to me as my old self. Shortly after that I ended up moving away and we never pursued my gender change any further. On occasion, I do feel guilty I didn’t give him the chance to try to transition with me.
So, as we proceed down this very complex and long journey, we find there is no easy answer to the amount of transitions we go through. Some transgender women go down the surgical path to what they consider “the final solution” then again, some don’t.
Along the way, somehow we have to consider those making the transition with us. Some never make the journey for what ever reason but some do. Making room for those that do is the essence of being an understanding transgender woman. It’s exceedingly hard to do on such an often lonely path we didn’t choose to accept but somehow find away to exist with. The whole process has a tendency to make us seem selfish.
As you can see from the picture, Joni has transitioned well. To my knowledge she hasn’t had any surgery but has been on HRT for several years. Congratulations on others around her accepting for her true self!
As I perhaps have pointed out, there is another “social” scheduled for Thursday night in one of the local seafood restaurants. The event is hosted by the transgender – cross dresser group I am part of. The group also has support group meetings which are still virtual and I have not attended recently.
So far it looks as if I will be attending by myself as Liz most likely will have to work over.
I am looking forward to getting out of the house again and casually dressing up as I have dinner. I am slightly different than more than a few of the others because I don’t have to go all out to impress anyone in the group. I am planning to wear my favorite form fitting patterned tank top along with a pair of my khaki culottes and black flats. I am going to pull my hair back into a flowing mane and wear a pair of dangling ear-rings to get about as dressed up as I get. As much as I don’t really care about the group, I do care about how the public perceives me.
The venue is slightly upscale so I feel, I should be too.
The picture is not what I am wearing but does show approximately how far hormone replacement therapy has changed me. Back then the hair was a wig and the rest was padding. Now it is all me.
Nina Humphrey from the “Credit Card. Com” website managed to navigate the confusing process of choosing between my two names and emails to reach me.
The problem is years ago when I completed my legal name change, I added another email with that name. With the time and effort I had spent over the years to build the Cyrsti’s Condo transgender blog, I didn’t want to start all over again. So on occasion, I encounter confusion when people try to reach me on the other email. An example was when I was accepted into the Trans Journalist Association. Emma needed to reach out on both emails to confirm my identity. FYI, I am really excited to be part of the Association!
Now, back to Nina. Here is part of what she wrote and a link to go to for more information:
We understand transgender individuals can transition without surgery or medical procedures by changing their clothing, pronouns, name and gender presentation. But money can often be a barrier for transgender folks, and getting accurate information about the costs of transitioning can be a hurdle in and of itself.
For those who do wish to get surgery, the costs vary significantly depending on details like insurance coverage and location. We created a guide to help transgender Americans by providing expert advice on:
“It’s important to us that the LGBTQ+ community has the protection and support it deserves. Which is why we want to do our part and share valuable information that benefits both the LGBTQ+ community and its allies. I recently came across your page and I wanted to share our resource which I thought would be a valuable addition to your page”
Most certainly, finances are always a major factor when considering major gender surgeries. Thanks Nina, for your information.
I read lots of books, from mythology retellings to literary fiction and I love to reread books from childhood, this is a place to voice my thoughts for fun. I also like to ramble about things such as art or nature every now and again.