Twice a week I apply new synthetic estrogen patches which help me match my exterior appearance with my inner gender feelings.
Approximately eight years ago I started my transgender transition journey very seriously by being able to begin hormone replacement therapy. Even though I was still living part time in both binary genders. Specifically, I was attempting to balance my old life as a man with my new life as a woman. Needless to say the entire process was very difficult for me and led to many other problems. I was miserable. Deep down I knew the answer was I couldn’t continue to live as a man any longer. Finally I faced reality and sought out medical help to start my hormonal journey.
As I write this post, or any others on HRT I urge anyone and everyone to seek medical advice to make sure you are healthy enough to do it.
Of course I had many questions I attempted to have answered as I started my journey. I learned of a nearby doctor in Dayton, Ohio who would prescribe hormones, was accepting new patients and didn’t require a therapists’ approval. I made an appointment and nervously showed up in the office.
Very soon I had a prescription for the minimum dosages of Estradiol and Spironolactone which would inhibit my testosterone. As I remember, the only real advice the doctor had for me was I would grow breasts, my hair would grow on my head and my sex drive would go away. I accepted all of that and off I went to the pharmacy. I think now I was more nervous in the pharmacy than the doctors office. Especially after the one time the pharmacist made it a point to loudly point out did I know what taking Estradiol would do to my body. Regardless of her transphobic mini rant, at that point of time I didn’t fully understand all of the changes which were coming.
The biggest change came when the Veteran’s Administration announced it would begin helpomg veterans with their HRT needs. Since I am a veteran and use VA health, I researched what I had to do to qualify for the program. Even though I disagreed in principal, I had to go through a VA therapist to be initially approved. I was fortunate. My assigned therapist had a knowledge of transgender issues and we are still together today. From that point forward I was able to purchase my meds through the VA and save money.
Since I was on a minimum dosage my changes were supposed to me minimum too. Except they weren’t, for the most part. Very quickly it seemed I was developing very feminine breasts, my body hair was thinning and yes the hair on my head really started to grow. It was time to quit wearing all my old guy clothes and start my life as a fulltime transgender woman which I was so ready to do. Except it was still so scary. You know what is said about the unknown.
As I fast forward till today, my experience with HRT has been a magic carpet ride. Over the years, my world has developed into a much softer place. Sure my breats have developed too as well as my skin has softened. I am more emotional and have a tendency to cry even when I am happy.
Overall, it’s been a fun journey I have been blessed to take. I used to think my bi-polar meds were the most important meds I take to maintain who I am.
Now I think it’s the Estradiol.