Halloween has become sort of a bittersweet day for me. 

While I have all the pleasant (even thrilling) remembrances of Halloween’s in the past, these days since I have been living all these years as a fulltime transgender woman, Halloween has become just another day. Plus, the covid virus has taken out any idea of having another annual witches ball this year, I can’t even put together a costume for that. 

Over the years though, I spent weeks (or longer) stressing on what I was going to wear on the one magical night a year I could go out and be myself. Typically I started with “streetwalker” drag and quickly advanced to a “professional woman” look. I wanted secretly to be viewed as a cis woman who showed up without a costume. 

Naturally, all these efforts met with varyingly levels of success. I went from my high heels killing my feet, to being recognized by an old acquaintance because I looked like my Mom, all the way to being asked by a future Washington politician (and his date) to another Halloween party after the one we were at. 

Then there was the first date I had with Liz (my partner) when we went to a major witches ball in Cincinnati when I was dressed as a wench and enjoyed all the pirates and belly dancers. 

As I seemingly close the door on Halloween this year though, I keep thinking there is always next year! 

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