Ironically, thanks to Michelle commenting on a recent Cyrsti’s Condo post, plus a recent article I read called the “Joy of Being Transgender” by Riley Black in the on line “Medium” magazine, I have been positively subjected to a couple great ideas concerning gender dysphoria.
First, Michelle’s comment:
“Here’s a thought that many of us might not think about. We have these moments that our GD (gender dysphoria) makes us feel good about ourselves and at other times we think the worst. I wonder just how many cis-women have almost the same feelings about their looks, mannerisms, relationships, etc.. I have talked to female friends about their feelings and find that many have similar feelings and emotions that I have. I know that most women don’t dwell on those thoughts but somewhere in the back of their minds it’s there. It started way back in early childhood when they were trying to find their niche in life and to some degree it has continued to later life. The only real difference between them and trans women is that time is more compressed for us.”
You are completely correct Michelle! Plus, anyone who doesn’t think cis women don’t go through their own brand of dysphoria is not facing reality. I have met very few cis women who don’t go through some sort of contortions to meet society’s standards. Examples would be diets, work outs, makeup etc.
The second post I found is from Riley Black and is on the Medium site. Riley writes about the joy of the changes coming from her HRT. (hormone replacement therapy). As much as I try, I couldn’t find much of a spot to jump in and give you a brief idea of what the writer is striving to get to. She blends it so well. However, I will try:
“I wish I could go back to myself two years ago, freshly out of a long-term relationship and just prior to starting hormone replacement therapy as I tried to pull my life together in a tiny basement apartment. The best I can do is go back and read my old journal entries from that time. Dated December 30th, 2018:
I feel like my brain and body are not in total alignment. I can think of many reasons not to change, not to follow this. But every time I do something a little more femme — the corset, the dress, thigh highs — my body flushes and my happiness seems evident. I find myself touching my chest more, wishing there were breasts there, and looking in the mirror, trying to envision what I might look like. It’s hard to imagine. I see stubble and sharp angles. Not the most masculine, but not exactly feminine, which just makes the thought of tits filling out my tees seems ridiculous. But I won’t know until I explore a little more.
Fast forward to today. I’m not washing up in the shower, touching my chest and asking what having breasts might feel like. I know. They’re there, tangible evidence of what time and a bit of estrogen can do. “They bounce,” as my girlfriend likes to remind me.”
If you would like to read more, I have added a link above for you to try. One fact remains though, gender dysphoria remains a very complex and personal issue.