I have been out for so long, I don’t normally give much thought to the National “Coming Out Day” which was yesterday.
As I have always written about, coming out can be on very many levels. As little as cross dressing and going out on rare occasions when you are safe, all the way to living full time as a transgender woman. Both are equally as important to the overall trans cause.
Through all of this though, I had my own “coming out” experience this morning. With our changing weather and numerous errands to run this morning, I had to go my wardrobe and find an outfit which was comfortable and was designed to blend with the majority of cis women I encounter. I came up with my long sleeved Durango, Colorado railroad shirt, along with a slightly faded pair of leggings with a pair of tennis shoes.
Normally, I am not real impressed with yet another rather mundane outfit but this morning However, today somehow was different. For once I accepted I had arrived. This was life as I hadn’t really planned for but found anyway.
The coming out process for me went something like this. I always knew my goal was to blend. Early on I focused on professional women around me. As I progressed though, I decided I loved the “hippie” bohemian styles from my youth. Finally these days I have settled on comfort and whatever style I can afford. I love this part of the year because I can wear my soft sweaters. colorful leggings and boots.
Most importantly, I have reached a point of having confidence in my feminine appearance which accordingly has acted as a deterrent to my gender dysphoria.
Whatever coming out means to you, building confidence could be your best friend. After all, the great majority of us start so far behind cis women applying makeup and having understanding of what outfits are flattering or not. One of the major problems is battling the mirror which always tries to lie to you and going through our teenage years when we are much older. Which leads to the stereotypical mid aged cross dresser in the mall stuffed into a mini skirt and heels.
Rest assured, it is all part of the coming out process. Here’s to hoping yours is coming along well too!