Two important discussions came up last night in the transgender – cross dresser support group meeting I went to. One of which involved the age old problem of “civilians” thinking trans people or cross dressers have a choice in choosing their gender lifestyle. Obviously, we don’t. We don’t wake up one day and think “Gee” this will be a great day to change my gender. Arguably one of the tougher things to do as a human being. Not to mention the havoc the change causes to family, friends and work.
To make matters worse, very few of us are “naturals” and have to go through all kinds of contortions to help our exteriors match what our interiors are feeling. I know I am basically speaking to the choir here in Cyrsti’s Condo but if I am not, imagine waking up in the morning not knowing which gender you are.
These days though, we are fortunate to be experiencing the rise of the acceptance of “gender fluid” individuals. people are being accepted for being a curious mixture of the two binary genders, plus at the least, claiming gender fluidity gives questioning trans people a niche to go to while they explore where they are going with their lives.
All in all, times are a changing as we begin to explore all the fascinating facets of life humans can explore.
The second discussion which came up last night (by me) was how we know we are making the correct life choice as we begin our transition. Some end at cross dressing, others go all the way through surgery and physically change their gender. Take me for example. My inner gender compass centered up when I started to live full time as a transgender woman. I don’t need to risk my body and have any surgeries.
My message last night seemed to resonate with a new attendee who was just starting down their (my assigned pronouns) gender path. They were questioning when they would know which direction they were headed as a cross dresser or beyond. I simply told them to try to feel what your inner compass was telling you but harder yet try to follow it.
I know it is easier said than done in most cases.